The Doorman

by Steve Kay, Managing Director, qualityculture Ltd

I was at a Round Table dinner a few years ago, all blokes wearing dinner suits and an ex footballer telling stories about being an England player in the world cup final back in 1966. As I wondered back into the room there was a guy on his own waiting for someone, I presumed. “How are you?” I said. “I’m Steve from Ashby.” Well he seemed a bit offish but I persisted “Can I buy you a beer?” “No thanks” he replied. I adopted a similar stance to him (I had come across mirroring and matching and thought it worth a try) “Did you enjoy the speech?” I enquired. “Are you from Derby?” “Yes” he replied. Ah I thought, getting somewhere at last. “Are you with Derby Round Table?” “No I’m the doorman” he said.

Now let me tell you something you may not know. You have a doorman in your head. That’s right in fact we all do. He keeps out everything that’s not of interest to you and only lets in what you want to know. We call this the Reticular Activating System.

Once something becomes important like that new car you desire, suddenly they are everywhere. Your doorman lets them in. Your doorman is a fairly simple guy he acts on instructions from the manager. You! If you don’t want something in your life or rather, you don’t think about it he won’t let it past the door. However if you have a goal you are exited about he will let lots of information related to it. This means you can set bigger goals in the knowledge that the information will come through.